A personality disorder would mostly appear in early adolescence and then would continue into ones adult life. Personality disorders are explained in psychiatric terms as “a group of mental illnesses that severely disturb the character and behaviour of an individual”. Certain behaviour patterns would be regarded as abnormal. The patterns of behaviour can be very intense, dramatically persistent and would affect most aspects of a person’s life. This would include the way they think, their emotions, how they are around other people and in social situations, etc. I can only state what I have learned and already know about myself. Personality disorders may not be noticeable at first, it can develop over time during early teens and according to life’s everyday events and situations. There are many types of personality disorders, and people can be diagnosed with other disorders at the same time, which is not unusual. This would be especially noted in the Borderline personality disorder, I was diagnosed with BPD in 1996.
There is always controversy regarding Borderline PD, arguing whether it is or is not a “real” disorder in itself, because it always co-exists with several other disorders. Certain personality disorders are always a controversial diagnosis, covering a wide range of different behaviours. The term “Personality Disorder” is more or less used to describe certain behaviours that do not fit into any other obvious diagnostic category. The sufferer would persistently have great difficulty coping with life and would constantly cause distress to themselves or others (sometimes without realising it). What would be considered “normal” to people with a personality disorder, may not be considered “normal” to the rest of society. But what is “normal”? Nobody on earth is actually “normal” or perfectly sane, and nobody can ever define the word “normal”, its impossible for everybody to be the same, if that was the case, then we would be like robots. Personality disorders tend to arise in early teens, and continues through adulthood and most of their adult life without the correct type of treatments. Children may not be diagnosed with certain personality disorders as such, it maybe described as “conduct disorder”, but a conduct disorder would not necessarily lead to a personality disorder in adult life. People with personality disorders tend to have a narrow range of coping mechanisms. Personality disorders are arranged in Clusters (A, B, C). Often people have an idea that people with personality disorders are dangerous, but I would say, it depends on the person and the personality disorder.
The general common suggestions regarding Borderline PD would be, e.g. difficult childhood, traumas such as neglect, lack of security, sexual abuse, physical and mental abuse, also neurological and genetic factors. When you have a personality disorder, other mental health conditions will also be present, such as depression, anxiety, and panic disorder, etc. I always say to myself, “is it these other mental health problems that cause personality disorders, or is it vice versa” ? Maybe they’re not related but present themselves side by side. It’s difficult to diagnose personality disorders, because other mental health problems may simply hide behind the personality disorder itself. Also, it’s easy to misdiagnose someone as having a personality disorder, when in reality the person maybe suffering from another mental illness. There are specific types of personality disorders, and at least three or four long term symptoms need to be present and persistent for a period of time before making a diagnosis.
Obviously with all disorders, there’s a lot more to it in order to diagnose somebody with any of them, With some disorders, diagnosis can take quite some time, very complex indeed, therefore should be followed through with a considerable amount of patience, intellect, and understanding on both sides (the patient and the professional). Although alongside Borderline PD (which I still have), different professionals over the past 20+ years have each said different things to me, e.g I was diagnosed with D.I.D (Dissociative) at one point (many years ago), and Schizo-Affective (many years ago).
Emotionally Unstable / Borderline Personality Disorder: (briefly explained)
* Tendency to act impulsively without any consideration or knowing thought of consequences.
* Never able to plan ahead, lack of self-control.
* Intense scenes of anger which can also lead to violence and extreme behaviour, especially if acting on impulse, or challenged and provoked.
* Difficulty in controlling anger, and frequent displays of bad temper.
* Severe dissociative symptoms, transient, stress related paranoid ideation.
* Constantly trying to avoid abandonment. (real or imagined – death or otherwise)
* Unstable relationships and friendships by alternating between extreme idealisation and devaluation unpredictably.
* Suicidal behaviour, gestures, threats, and self-mutilating actions. (recurrent)
* Instability due to reactions of their moods. (e.g. intense dysphoria, anxiety, and irritability)
The Impulsive type would be characterised by emotional instability and an inability to control oneself. There’s much more to it, but they would be the basics. The sense of emptiness can commonly lead to self-harm, involvements in unstable relationships, and that will often cause the Borderline PD sufferer to become even more emotionally distressed.
As with all disorders / illnesses, sufferers are always going to feel like outsiders, and continue to feel that other people will not understand them and how they feel, unless one feels the same. In saying this, I do hope in time to come there will be a greater understanding and awareness in society. Greater understanding leads to sufficient progress. We have a need to feel wanted and welcomed, rather than feeling like outsiders. It is vital for the people in charge of our care and treatment to be prepared to work alongside us.
You cannot choose who you want to treat, whether the person maybe easy to work with or not. For example if I was working as any type of mental health worker, I would not say to the person, “I choose not to work alongside you because you get angry, you complain, your mood changes, you’re very difficult and I’m not prepared to go through your most difficult of moods even though I may specialise in your disorder.” In fact, I would say the complete opposite, I would say “it would be an honour to work alongside you through your most difficult of moods, no matter how long it takes, because I know you cannot control it at this point in time, and you can indeed trust me to make sure I understand you and try to help you to the best of my ability as this is my obligation in my profession to any person”. 
People suffering mental illness should not be treated like “bad” people, we are suffering, we did not bring the illness onto ourselves. We are not “awkward” people. What sufferers really may long for deep down, is simple care, reassurance and understanding, and not the opposite.
I surely hope soon enough in society there may be more advantages for people with mental disorders, and less disadvantages. The world cannot change in one day, but that does not mean we have to give up altogether. Things can change, and get better. We, can change, and live a normal life, but not if some people in society are preventing us by being inconsiderate, impatient and discriminative. Just as a damaged leg takes time to heal in order to walk properly again, it’s the same with mental health. There are no two ways about it, and nobody should feel ashamed or embarrassed of whatever mental health problems they suffer from.
My respect will always go out to those that are trying to make a difference in conquering stigma and discrimination… And so, if understanding is near, then progress will quickly follow.
Mind With A View 